February 21, 2006
Show Notes for 13.0 - Diaper Dan
[Thank you to the gorgeous Ms Marina for the intro to the show!]
The hosts of Fetish Flame are graced with the presence of Diaper Dan and Madame Gina Grant, who provide additional information on the differences between Diaper Lovers and the Adult Baby/Infantilism population.
Dan has an incredible life story that all fetishists will find interesting. He is very comfortable with his kink and openly discusses all facets of how it started and how things have grown and changed over the last 30+ years. He is articulate, funny, and, says Nova, very handsome.
He generously shares stories of the evolution of his kink, from his first orgasm in seventh grade while rolling around in a pair of rubber pants to the current day setting of fun and elaborate sessions with Madame Gina in her play space.
Nova digs a bit into Dan's don't-ask-don't-tell policy with the woman with whom he shares his life.
Dan offers up some suggestions on how to set up the core elements of different role playing sessions. Atticus' favorite:
Nurse Ratchet: "Your stay here can be either constructive and a truly watershed event in your correctional development, or beyond even your most perverted and sorted nightmares. It's your choice, Danny."
He shares tips for finding a professional willing play in this fetish, and what to do and not to do when you contact them. Doms who do this are very much in the minority, but this actually plays into Dan's enjoyment: he gets off the taboo of his fetish.
Finally, he answers a listener's question about ordering products discreetly. As promised, here are the websites he suggests:
Diaper Connection, Diaper Station, Plastic Pants, Fetware, and SafeComfort.
Posted by Nova at February 21, 2006 03:45 AM
Posted by: Floyd Pepper at February 21, 2006 07:46 PM
Congrats! On another awesome show. I love your podcast and listen to every episode. As much as I LOVE hearing you guys talking about all kinds of fetish, and sometimes helping me to discover new ones, I am always especially excited when you guys touch upon a fetish that interests me personally. Thank you again for doing such an amazing job on covering the Diaper Fetish. It is so rare to find a forum that takes the time to understand and portray this fetish in a intelligent and responsible manner. I really appreciate the work you both do. It is so incredibly valuable to have a place were one can hear and learn about things they don't understand in a manner that doesn't those of us into this fetish out to be a freak or joke. I just may have the courage to have my fiance listen to this episode. I'm willing to bet it just may help her to understand You guys are truly the best! You have a fan for life!
Posted by: Reef Astenable at February 21, 2006 07:46 PM
Some listeners may enjoy hearing Nova say "panties", but there are those of us who much prefer it when she says "diapers". :-)
Another great show on the diaper fetish. I know it's been said a lot, but you two are doing important things for those of us who are into this. By having thoughtful, intimate conversations with otherwise "normal" people, you are inspiring people to communicate more openly. And that's very, very helpful.
I also wanted to say that I totally related to what Nova said about how she might feel getting rejected by doms, although I have never gone to one.
I have since totally accepted my fetish, and so has my partner, but there was a time in my life when having a professional dominatrix tell me "No, I don't do that", would have made me feel like the weirdest freak in the world (no fault of hers).
Again, great show. You two rock.
Posted by: intenselygreen at February 21, 2006 10:03 PM
Great show, and I was one of the listeners who were rolling eyes saying, "another diaper show?" But just as was the case after the first, I came away from the show with more knowledge, understanding, and a terrific sense of sympathy. Diapers aren't my passion but I don't think they'll squick me out as they may have before this. It shouldn't still surprise me but it does; Nova and Atticus take on a topic in which I think there'll be little or nothing for me, and instead I find that while the details may be strange, there is a lot of common experience and feeling. (please excuse the run-on sentence)
I think most people have very ideosyncratic turn-ons often very focused on details of sight, sound, taste, smell, feel etc, and we construct a framework of concepts and constructs in which these sensations make sense. Our trees are our own, but the forests can be shared and communicated. First principles in fetish tend to be individual, and are often from our earliest puberty or pre-puberty awareness. Dan started off with the feel and sensation of diapers and rubber pants and his interests coalesced into a fetish. He didn't start off with the distinction between infantilism versus humiliation versus internal/external control, his interest and experience grew and he became articulate enough to say yes to this and no to that, and aware that other enthusiasts may break down their interests similarly or differently.
So I can see that my initial disinterest in a diaper show was because I had the process backwards. Dan didn't decide a priori to embrace diapers, reject infantism, have some interest in sissification and humiliation, as well as interest in internal/external control and power exchange. Dan accepts himself and his emotional and physical responses, with an articulate and intelligent sense of humour, and everything else flows from that. In this his story is touching, encouraging, and even inspirational.
I appreciate the control issues, which are closer to my own hot buttons. I appreciated the imaginery passage from Nurse Ratchet (whose name by the way I assumed was rat-shit when I first saw Cuckoo's Nest). The passage gets right to the heart of control in a submissive-domme relationship. The sub either resists, and receives punishment as a direct consequence, or one goes along with the domme's actions, and becomes an accomplice to the exchange of power. It pulls the sub out of a passive situation and puts him or her in a lose-lose situation in which the behaviour of the domme and the sub are interactive. The sub isn't just acted upon but acts and reacts in an exchange where the power in the relationship flows away from the sub towards the domme. This dynamic overlaid on a diaper situation is a cool mirror of the external control in a domme experience, with the internal control of one's bowels. For Madame Gina Grant to put Dan in an experience in which he gives control, loses control, or has her take control, simultaneously on such different levels, well, it gave me an appreciation of the fetish that I wouldn't have thought possible.
This is my take on the show and I've noticed in previous show notes that other people often come away from a given topic with very different ideas and emotions than I do. I'd love to read other people's takes on this show.
Posted by: Diaper Dan at February 23, 2006 08:15 AM
I just want to say how much I enjoyed _doing_ this podcast with the Nova, Gina and Atticus.
Nova, Atticus - You are a breath of fresh air for all of us. I just want you to know that when you find yourself driving home at the end of a brutal day and all you want to do is collapse on the couch, kick your feet up and read a book (or put the hood on)...but then you somehow rally, lock yourselves into the studio with a guest and weave one of your magical podcasts, you are touching countless souls out there in a very, very special way my friends.
Following that evening, I found myself reflecting upon your many listeners around the planet who are still fresh on their journey of self-exploration through kink; how exhilarating and yes, sometimes a little confounding as well. I cherish the privilege of being able to share a little of myself - as well as a few laughs _about_ myself.
You two are my heroes. Thank you for inviting me into your home and allowing me to privelege of carrying the fetish flame for a lap or two.
And intenselygreen...you absolutely blew me away with how you expressed the dynamics of control. You nailed it. Bravo... Mind if I quote that last paragraph.
Posted by: Madame Gina Grant at March 1, 2006 03:10 AM
Atticus and Nova, thank you for the opportunity to talk with you and your listeners about a passion of mine. And Dan, thank you for sharing this passion with everyone!
I think intenselygreen touched upon the heart of what I love about diaper play. All my play involves me taking control or power in one form or another. It can be by force, or it can be through surrender. Both are delicious to me! And though the accoutrements of diaper play are a bit different or more unusual than an SM scene or corporal discipline scene, the end goal is the same...for me to have the ultimate control and power over another soul. And in this way, diaper play has more in common with all other types of play I do than not.
Posted by: scotty at March 2, 2006 03:18 AM
Another great show! I started listening back before Christmas and caught up on all the shows. I am also a diaper lover and have shared it with my wife to some extent. Revealing my interests to her has been a bit like peeling an onion. Dan was very articulate in his description of his interests. I've also tried to deconstruct my fetish and determine exactly what it was that pushed my buttons. Like Dan, I believe intense humiliation and loss of power and control is at the center of it all. I used to think of diapers and plastic pants as the focus, but it's really more about me, as a man, being put in a humiliating circumstance such as being treated like a child. The more humiliating, the better! Any variation that can cause embarassment and humiliation works. I'd like to thank Diaper Dan for helping me take the fetish apart to determine the turn-ons and motivations about it!
Posted by: Matt at March 14, 2006 04:25 AM
Nova & Atticus,
I just wanted to write in and say how much I love your show. As an adult baby, it thrills me that you've done two shows now related to it. I'd be really interested to hear from a female into diapers and an adult baby to get a bit of a different perspective...but as with everything else both fetish and otherwise you can talk for an hour or a year and still have only scratched the surface. I love what you've been doing and I hope to hear more great things :)
p.s. Nova, I love your voice ;)
Posted by: J at March 17, 2006 02:22 PM
Another great show. Was good to hear yet another perspective on diaper play, as I am always looking to learn more. This is my first comment in a while as I have been out of the loop, but I have to share a comment I found on a fan's myspace blog:
"Fetish Flame has a new podcast up about ABDLs! This show previously featured a couple who engage in diaper play, and I was quite pleased with the way that the whole subject was treated.
I'm partway through this new interview with "Diaper Dan" and he's talking about his history and the development of his sexual attraction with rubber pants and diapers, along with the involvement of other people (or failed attempts at involvement).
Give it a listen, if you have time. It is a 50 minute broadcast, but I think it's worth it. The previous diaper podcast is there in the archives, as long as shows about many other fetishes like latex and spanking. "
Now Im not sure how much everyone realizes it but Fetish Flame is getting HUGE so I want to say keep up the great work and I always look forward to hearing the next shows, Any chance you can give us a little hint on what shows we can expect over the next few months Nova? Oh yeah A and I will be back in CA again next month so let us know how busy things are looking for you and Atticus. Take care
Hello,I just recently stumbled onto this sight. I'm a diaper lover, and just wanted to say how interesting the diaper fetish podcasts were. Thank you so much for the respectful manner in which these were done. I hope you read and respond to this. Once again thankyou.
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